Why Do I Feel So Bad? (2021)


Why Do I Feel So Bad? – Harvey Dog (2021)

Lyric

The Pills - drawing by Harvey Dog 2021

Why do I feel so bad?
I used to feel so good,
that was a long long time ago,
I think it may have been a dream

sweet dreams
too dream…

The moon is crying
and the sun is dying,
The words I’m writing
have no meaning,
The books I’m reading
have me screaming

I can’t go on

All alone with anxiety
all alone in society,
The dreams I’m dreaming
have left me screaming,
The life I’m leading
has no meaning

I can’t go on

All alone
in the danger zone (2x)
All hope is gone
I can’t go on…

Why do I feel so bad?
these pills
should be working
by now…

any day…
(fucking Effexor)


Original Poem (October 20th, 2020)

Man Screaming - drawing by Harvey Dog 2021

why do I feel so bad
I used to feel so good
that was a long
long time ago
it may have been a dream

the moon is screaming
the sun departed
why do I feel so bad?
these pills
should be working by now.


Video


Notes

  • This piece started life as a short poem about depression/feeling bad. I decided to record a poetry reading of the piece, and it eventually morphed into this 2:38 creation with cool guitar samples & loops from SampleFocus.
  • I was diagnosed with depression at the age of 40; but, it has been ever-present in my life since a childhood stint in the hospital and continues to be a perpetual struggle to this very day. I hope this helps chip away at the stigma of depression.
  • Grammarly’s Tone Detector for the lyric (Informative *****, Sad *****, Disapproving ****). Yes! Grammarly got it!

Poem: October 20, 2020
Lyrics & Recording: June 2021


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